tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-61380584103702111922024-02-20T02:40:44.223-08:00In Search of My HomeDiksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-79420214128206040082012-01-09T10:50:00.000-08:002012-01-09T10:51:33.914-08:00Life and Celebrations....<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="mbl notesBlogText clearfix"><div>And its that time of the year that has always been very special,its that time of the year with feelings ,with romance,with illusions ,with mysteriousness,yes its that time of the year which has been celebrated through the centuries as an era when love has always been in air.Stupendous as it sounds,with christmasses followed by fresh breaths of the new year winds full of exciting possibilities,of laughs,of love,of moments of lifetime when life diffuses itself in its entirety of tremendousness....who knows how many tragedies will the times to come will play out,how many minutes of happiness,how many more hours of untold misery ,how many miracles,how many wonderwalls to cross,how many dreams ,how many castles ,how many realizations and how many modes of unexplored self-expression.<br />
And one day you know, amidst those wintry mirage of foggy clouds ,pigeons would flow by....blown away with the gusto of the fast -moving winds ...and towards the unchartered directions which it would follow unquestioningly and questioningly,completely trusting the magic of the universe and destiny. Those love pigeons ....they would carry symbols and signs of love,wrapped about their wings flapping vigourously at the possibilty and excitement of love,giggling uncontrollably with the innocence with which lovers would wait for their telegrams ....wrapped with the fragrance of aphrodisiac....conveying the handwriting,tear droplets, touch, sensuousness and ambience of the beloved.<br />
And not just standardized,typed,printed,e-mailed or SMSed letters.<br />
Ah! Love letters.....not just letters, but also telegrams of Peace...<br />
Mental delusional emotional sensual physical visual and also of the Final Farewell.<br />
Because sometimes all we can do is hope that love would surprise us one day day knowing well that love remains forever synonymous with life.<br />
Because Paul Coelho once said,"We have to stop and be humble enough to understand that there is something called mystery."<br />
<br />
<br />
Love<br />
Mischelle </div></div></div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-11838885695630884562011-04-19T13:46:00.000-07:002011-04-19T14:30:08.720-07:00For Teek<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><br />
I</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">We are all assholes</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Indeed we are </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">It hurts like hell</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">That feeling as if</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Something is strangling</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Me so hard</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">That I can’t seem to feel alive AGAIN</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">If all those who love each other could be together and all those who yearn for each other each other could express the same .Those barriers for that matter …they keep us so much apart …so much away….they cause so much hurt…so much pain.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">This world has created enormous distances…as distances distance me from you.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">How does it leave hope for survival of the world </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">For the sake of life that runs in the veins of the eternity all around me </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Oh Dear Mighty <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>! Let Peace prevail <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>! Let there be light </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Take my love …Give my love</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Let it share</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">But how can that be if that is not it</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">You brake speed at every sign</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Why every step sanctions divine</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">When I don’t feel a God beneath</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">When security disguises as religious shrine</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Comes knocking at the door of my oblivion</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I don’t know where went the fairies</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">They were always here with me</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">They were always here with me</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Lullabying<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>me to sleep.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>II</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Ok Listen</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I’m very tensed</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I know how I always bug you</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">How I always shock you</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">And then distance myself </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Is it a game kind of thing ?hm?</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Alright</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Because I know men are donkeys</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I hate them for that</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Crazy they are</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Idiotic I feel</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I miss you like heavens miss hell</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Like rains miss monsoons</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Like we idiots miss face book</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Like I miss staring at your updates on face book</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I miss you through this pain</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">It hurts each second </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I try to prove my worthiness…my decency </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I am tired of this exercise…of this entire proving business….</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As in why do I feel I have to</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I stand before myself facing theses clouds</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I keep digging into the unearthed rocks </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">The dire need for erosions struck me not once not twice but again..</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">This trust was always the most difficult thing to give</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">But as I look around this world of humans</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">How complex…why does it have to be so many of us….like too many cooks spoiling the broth or what?</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Have we made it for ourselves Just how?</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Is the world of that cute little jerky ant seriously as complex?</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I wish I knew.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Thus.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I write thus </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I go to sleep</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I lie down in bed</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I stare at your face book page.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I stare at your DPs</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I go on all my trips tours and travels</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Sitting in that ruthlessly cold and honest train</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Through the awesome night –time discussions</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Through that difficult scary night at Panna you would never know.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Through the long late night walks ,conversations, awesome things</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I wish you were here</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I wish you were just there</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Sitting bullshitting</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Laughing crapping writing</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Observing secretly smiling that jhandu way you always did</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">But still I wish you were just there</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Here.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>III</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Insomnia for instance….no wait !</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Will you take responsibilty for her dark circles…..</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Jerk !!!!!<br />
Princesses have to be goodlooking and youthful you idiot!!!!!!!!!!<br />
I know yours is an extremely busy life<br />
but I am telling you a cute little princess is facing a lot of issues because of you....</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
IV</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Hey I<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>miss you every moment …every millimoment</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Every draconian time</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I don’t know what to say</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I am so saaaaad</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">My life becomes recklessly ruckus without you </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I am sad because I know a lot of my desperations might just be a façade</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">May only be a dream…another fantasy…</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Who knows!</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">But still as my heart craves for more</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">All the practicalities came rushing by </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">And I attempted to let them take over me </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I wasn’t surprised by the futility of the attempt as I bring myself to realize again and again</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">That I was never meant to be grounded</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Oh dear piscse! Help me breathe…….</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>V</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Because I want a man</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Who loves me as much as I love him</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">If not more</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I want a man who tears apart at the sight of me walking away</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As much as I do</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Because I want a man </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Who misses me as intensely as I miss him</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Because I want a man who treasures every moment spent with me</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As much as I do</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">And if this can’t be</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Let me be single.</div></div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-64342985687335843532011-04-08T10:18:00.001-07:002011-04-19T14:22:23.307-07:00Pangs of Jealousy and Acceptance<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">Well she is not exactly the unfortunate types.Infact she is awesome,his types!Dunno but certainly awesome!Infact actually its so great as it means lesser misery in this world,but then how does she manage to be better than me.I hate her for that!She’s not supposed to be so good!It’s not my fault that I melt at the slightest provocation,Its not my fault that I seemingly don’t have a life,It’s not my fault that I am such a loner who goes on receding into her shell……Why does she have to be so much better than me! More so,why does she have to be so nice to everyone?even me????Infact how does she manage to be so nice?I’m sad.</div><div class="MsoNormal">She’s just like him.Infact she suits him.Much better.She is very compatible with him.I think they will see it if they haven’t seen it till now that living together for them will be as simple as breathing.I have never felt this way!Infact its great that they can find love in each other,it’s a great achievement if anyone can do it to each other,but it comes as a surprise.I feel lost as always,but then those were supposed to be my own problems no!</div><div class="MsoNormal">Cmmon….all I feel is lifelessness all around.And acceptance has become a struggle.really!I wonder if it were always so…but no! I don’t think so .</div><div class="MsoNormal">I feel sad sad and sad.</div><div class="MsoNormal">And lost lost and lost.</div><div class="MsoNormal">Actually today I don’t feel that bad.But yesterday,just before sleeping ,a realization came over me.It lasted more than a moment actually.More than many seconds.And then I was fast asleep.And today amidst the hassles of waking up,I was reminded of that intuition,if that was what it is.And it was like something dawned upon me which I hadn’t been able to see because of curtains…and of course because of lack of communication and distances .Oh! Well IF he isn’t as complicated as me or maybe as he claims to be,the truth is he doesn’t love me.Maybe he never did.Whats the point.ASS I AM.I know ….koi nahi hota hai…but yaar bahut dard deke jaata hai.I miss you like hell.And I’m jealous….it grows with time.She has a firmness about her,in that sense she may not suit you…but you never know.She is definitely what I am not.</div><div class="MsoNormal">Love </div><div class="MsoNormal">Mischelle</div></div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-18706558590831403312011-03-02T01:50:00.001-08:002011-03-02T02:01:56.332-08:00Strands of Decency<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Oh! how to describe<br />
How you behave Now it seems like<br />
<br />
how well have you acclimatize yourself<br />
<br />
in this strange deceptive world<br />
I don't get it<br />
I seriously feel this world is a misfit and you even more<br />
But I awe at the way you meander your way through this mayhem.Well,I'm surprised.<br />
<br />
I just now saw a tall decent gentleman dressed in a nice suit carrying a nice bag,but you know he' a misfit.As in the suit doesn't suit him.He looks straight ahead ,but his eyes are on a lookout for something else....a faraway land.Oh! Stop it......<br />
but for something else in people I mostly guess.But he's quite tolerant ...infact has become of things &people who just don't seem alike.<br />
<br />
I seriously am clueless about the struggle ;quite ignorant of this tussle in a man's world .But I wonder if we were to shake off the dusty blanket from your body ,carefully and gently and carefully uncover your face,I think we would discover a different you.A very different you.<br />
<br />
But one thing I seriously admire you for ....as in the way you sweet talk peple ,the way you let babies sleep to the tunes of decency....but the truth is ...they are going to realize soon .Anyway it was only a tune ....not tangible enough.Not proof enough.<br />
But then what proof do we want ?What proof do I need?For what....Life had been tumultous enough.These shades that I see ....fading into eternity....I wonder often ,what it takes to try and be one with it......</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-55380726684557550272011-02-28T01:06:00.000-08:002011-03-02T01:50:01.743-08:00Sleeplessly sleepless<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Well I am not really the kind of person who talks in facts and points and parenthesis, but the thing is I am just feeling a little factual right now:</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Well I wonder how much I have started sleeping……I have never been a disciplined person ….much lesser as far as timely and proper sleep was concerned….but now <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m surprised,how much do I sleep.Infact even a 6 hour sleep doesn’t suffice when previously even 5 hours would do well…..I am surprised how I dutifully go to bed by 10 or 11 only to be able to wake up at 7:30 .Well,I’m surprised.I sleep a lot nowadays.somewhere,it feels good to be able to reach college on time,but then I feel numb.A lot.My entire being goes numb.There are times when after a day of lot of work,I still can’t sleep as even when I like the work my mind goes numb.There is an expanse of hollow loneliness which surrounds you as you try to bid this world goodbye to sleep.Insomnia troubles a lot but thankfully it is rare…..and surprisingly after such spells of insomnia ,I don’t feel deprived of sleep at all next morning.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Life ...its amazing sometimes….as in I amazes me a lot.I’m surprised I feel so numb nowadays,I don’t know why….I can’t know why.nevertheless I feel <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>numb And I don’t know what to do.I don’t feel anything.I can’t understand anything.all I gauge is dints of things which render me bewildered and perplexed and sometimes also make me look like a fool to my minds’ eyes.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Actually I’m just forcing myself to write <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>bullshit .Don’t even feel any muse.And no muse means bad writing.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 10pt;">So I’ll just shut up and perhaps catch up a nice romantic flick.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Chal ceeya.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Love</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Mischelle</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><3</span></div></div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-23315852435257261552011-02-05T12:45:00.000-08:002011-02-05T13:06:54.560-08:00Heights......<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Oh Heights !<br />
<br />
Why do I fear you so much.....<br />
I cannot stand you<br />
Cannot control ....oh Heights ! I am powerless<br />
I always wanted to overcome you......I already have I guess taken the first step towards independence....first step towards breaking free<br />
I am not the same<br />
<br />
I won't be the same....<br />
life is about risks<br />
Just can't break free from the challenge of pisces<br />
<br />
oh !Why am I such a girl sometimes...<br />
Is it girly to not to be able to bear those barbaric gory sights?<br />
Is it girly not to be able to withstand any pain?any blood?<br />
Is it girly to want things to be twinkling and lovely?<br />
Oh is it being like a hundred percent female?<br />
The sin of being a pisces? Oh ! shall I call it sin?If not then what?<br />
Its made me needy.......left me weak...weak willed.......a weak pesonality<br />
What to do?I'm lost....<br />
I wish I could be able to say with pride that I will go rock climbing ....sky diving....but I can't <br />
I am scared.....I am too scared<br />
Do angels fear to plunge in...????pisceans do.....<br />
I sometimes wish I had the courage to walk up the entire snow clad hills and mountains......I wish I had the choice to do that alone cause I have understood noone is made for anyone....everyone is made for themselves....and there would be noone to take me by hand.....to those everlasting expanse of heights....my friend did it ...that enthusiastic adventurous resilient Shaily....she took me by hand down the dangerous rocky mountaineous valleys....she led me and I loved it ....it was so comfortable.....to be able to rely trustfully on someone so strong......so self assured a girl as Shaily .....Girl! She is something of a person....One of the most courageous girls I have ever met...and a courageous person toooooo.....<br />
But I always loose my senses ...it seems always as if I have lost a part of something....I wonder sometimes if that has something to do with a fish's affinity to water....but then even waterfalls ....cold waterfalls...I think even thet sent a chill down my spine....<br />
i never realized as a child...I was afraid of heights.....dreaded afraid of heights......Oh ! What is it??????I never seem to get it<br />
Heights......!!!!!!!!Yummy.......I want to come to you....but can't seem to....what to do?????? </div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-9230804467955746402011-02-05T10:45:00.000-08:002011-02-05T10:51:46.490-08:00Desperation.......................................................................................<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">I understand now the meaning of desperation...man ! real desperation<br />
I knew it before but I could always do something about it.....this time I can't....u know these self faith and self confidence are amazing things to possess....they are important and if u don't have them...girl ! life is difficuilt! Courage is another important thing...infact very very important ...shy people don't stand anywhere....I need a rabbit...a pet rabbit...I don't think I will survive in this cruel brutal world of humans....I need one please I do.I dunno I'm helpless.....I need comfort....loads of it.....where do I go....I am lost...lost lost and lost....forever.....and I'm dying I want to be in the water.....to breathe in those waters in the middle of those jungles.......loving mesmerizing sleeping sheltered deep under the roofshed of tall loving green treesssssss....<br />
love<br />
mischelle</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-68731918581090770072011-02-03T13:46:00.000-08:002011-02-13T11:29:37.730-08:00My Sweet Little Play School....oh ! sorry Home<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Here I must mention a few things.I have always been angry about things,excessively much recently,and always hurled abuses at people things everything everyone around me.....at the air around me......and all my notes recently had a reflection of anger pitted out in them.....and I'm stuck there.I don't know why....<br />
<br />
I want to be less angry....lesser disturbed....lesser freaked out.These mood swings .....this repetitive recession into my shell......this need for warmth......this lost control over life......its all killing me.<br />
<br />
Well I was wondering how ambitious I used to be.....how driven to different things......how much committed to my work..........Always initiating different things....never feeling that shallowness....those irritable burdens....never lazy.....but now ????I have become a shirker.......I avoid work?I used to do things....work ...everything mindlessly....but now I don't.If I don't like it,I don't do it.That's that.And that's it.Thats being lazy.That's being lovely.And that's being fair to myself.And that's being able to breathe at the end of it all.....But yes I miss love.....and it drives me crazy......stupid....as in I wonder if there is an animal in us all....we all are barbaric in some sesnse or the other....actually innately barbaric....and all of us possess the ability of insurmountable love....and to stray as well in search of love and wramth and protection and peace.We are all assholes never to realize that.Actually see??????I told you ....anger reflected in all my notes!I am surprised at myself.....how can i be so angry.....so ridiculously barbaric......hurling abuses mindless abuses at everyone I come across.....Am i so angry with life...??so angry with my sunsign which made me so shy and compassionate ?I am surprised!<br />
anyways hahaha....I wanted to share about my nursery school dream and here I start talking other bullshit stuff...I always felt as if I wanted to open a nursery school....better still a play school....and love my babies all day.Everything will be so pleasant ands warm and loving and gentle and innocent.I want to love my babies....as in hug them all day.....and sit in sun....we all have needs man! needs to love and to be loved !And this is neglected to a large extent in a deeply conservative country like ours...trust me in every form.....as in our way of greeting ...notions and prejudices...actually its all a different story of regulation of sexuality by society and religion by different coercive and strategic methods.The state is intelligent...isn't it?<br />
Anyhow I love babies.and i don't want them to feel secluded all alone or unloved for any reason....I want them all to grow into contented ,happy and liberated individuals...irrespective of all reasons....with good physical and mental health.And I want to love them in every way possible...so that they don't feel unloved later.Ofcourse you know society is going to pounce upon them and impose its coercive standards upon them.....but before that I wish to help them realize their own potential....I won't have to teach them anything...I know its there within them already.I want them to feel loads of love from this age itself,its important you know it is.Actually hopefully they must already have been basking in love in their mommies' womb since 9 months and more after that....but they need to be constantly loved later on as well......and I'll ensure that their moms don't teach them stupid bullshit standards of society....actually I'll ensure that their moms don't teach them anything....even those babies have a right ....to discover their own place ....their own role...their own sense and interpretation of morality and sexuality....and I don't want oldies to interfere and decide for them....infact if parents were willing to let go off their children....let them grow independently in communians.....they will be better more inclusive and happier individuals.......parent are selfish and they are the ones standing in their children's path.....in way of their realizations.....Actually I wonder if I would be able to do that myself as a parent....as a single parent !?Did you notice I had been using the word 'my' for babies....as in do I possess them or what ...can't they have better sense of growing....just because they are babies?....no! but<em> just wanted to help....No! diksha its never yours...stop being possessive.....</em>I wish to try and undo all with the help of my fellowmates at the nursery or playhome or whatever beautiful pretty lovely colourful warm little place its going to be......and also with the help of my beautiful little babies....and one thing i promise its not going to be a school....children never grow in schools....infact noone really grows in a stringent even homely school....everyone grows at home....so whatever its going to be...its going to be a home...come back home babies to mumma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-87829032129700468852011-01-31T07:35:00.000-08:002011-01-31T07:51:08.529-08:00Weak<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Yes i agree i have self esteem issues....major ones....like major major ones.....and i wear this mask of a confident woman which i can no longer wear....i could never pretend........my face ...maybe my eyes......are so reflective ....they say everything .its difficuilt ...life when you can't pretend.it spills all your secrets.I know i am a weak personality....an extrememly weak personality.......by weak i don't mean a weak person but a weak personality.....and this weakness of personalty is slowly making the person inside it weak as well.....this person has lost its youth exuberance freshness....zeal .....life ...everything......and this person doesn't see much scope for hopes........these hopes are strange beings....they have a strange way of always being in your life implicitly.....<br />
Well you know i am too sensitive......i get hurt by the most mindless of comments ....direct or indirect and i rarely blame the person who comments....i blame myself for not realizing how stupid i am ....for not realizing that i had been in the dark till now....and i kind of thank the commentor for putting me down and telling me the truth....though the commentor mostly after a fraction of second realizes that he/she has made a hurtful one and tries to make up for it......I completely understand .....its not their fault...its a truth they couldn't help mentioning.....and i recede deeper into that shell.I am self conscious ....as in the way I look......mostly about being thin.I possess NO confidence.....I'm sure its going to surprise lots of people around me but yes NO confidence....I have perfectionist standards to meet....for my own self....which I can't ...I'm a loner...I've a poor aesthetic sense...as in I really don't possess the sense of good dressing up....unaware of brands...stuff.I see so many girls better dressed around me.......in sync with times....almost everyone.I have this huge desire to be super slim....i always had....and i am tired of dieting......crash diets....they used to work before....now even they don't.....yes....i hate myself....i hate the way i look....the way i foolishly keep blabbering to myself thinking that people are not noticing......i hate the fact that i just can't stop myself from talking endlessly infront of complete strangers when actually I'm actually a quiet & thoughtful person....I just don't want to hurt people and so i end up overtalking.....and making a fool of myself.....its embarassing...humiliating and i feel like running away....i hate it when i have to put up that mask of a careless brusque confident person that i am not....probably never will be....but yes i want to be thin and that I WILL BE....I'm surprised how have i managed to preserve that level of determination even now....after so many years....!!!!I'm surprised....</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-12242868627211453652011-01-29T12:51:00.000-08:002011-01-30T11:11:46.611-08:00whateva......no not whateva...!!!!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">kyun karti hun main itna time waste.....why cant i do anything constructive...???there were times when i used to be so driven and so committed to my work ...my aims.....what now....but now?????i am gone....ab nahi hoga na mujse ye sab......kya karun .......shall i give up....wase bhi college mey rehkar apna time waste karti hun......is being a piscean such a sin...kya karun ....mar jaun....bhaag jaun.......kya karun ab main.......ye life kitni wasted cheez hai...hum sab kitne misfits hain na..........all of us in the wrong places.....matlab zaruri hai college jaana...itna courage to shayad tha hi nahi kabhi mujhme ki main isse mukar jaun....ye saare systems jo society follow karti hai.....getting a degree.......no 4-5 degrees.......jobs....bullshit....oh ! why can't we travel with our loved ones....to far off lands......sit by the loving sands......fly in the oceans....with waters all around ......in the storm ...in the dark.......at the sunrise at the sunset....oh i would love to.........love to be led.....and also to be able to travel my own paths.......oh ! that courage....my own charted ways..........and i want to be independent and totally independent...but i'm still not sure of this....but one thing that i m more sure of ...i want someone at the end of it all....to lean on ....to hug and to share life with.........and this air that i breathe....and these magnetic sensousness.....and that everdying soul.....i am shit scared....i am alone...i'll die alone....oh what shall i do......no but i love being alone....but i fear sometimes it may not be good for me....not too much of it but i dont know....do i sound vague....hell the sin of being a piscean you know.........o o o ....hahahah.....this o o o thing is from hillary duff's what dreams are made of.....i love hillary duff....mostly....<br />
love<br />
mischelle</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-61957617259550492492011-01-29T12:18:00.000-08:002011-01-30T11:38:28.135-08:00Tum bhi na......<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">pagal ho ekdum pagal.......pata hai muje bahut dar lagta hai.....sachme bahut bahut bahut zyada kabhi kabhi bahut zyada........par pata hai kya.....main kabhi kisi pe bharosa nahi kar paati....u know muje bahut shak hote hain.....and i realized.........life without trust is a living hell.....and i want to be able to trust someone blindly........someone atleast....its been a long time now since i trusted someone blindly......infact i wonder have i ever trusted anyone blindly....????nnnnooooooooo....!!!!!!survival has become such a struggle now that there us noone to trust .....i find myself receding deeper and deeper into the seas......kahin itna na doob jaun ki kabhi nikal hi na paun.....baseless fears?????? i don't know....i neva seem to get it.......i am tooo scared ....i was always toooooo scared....i never had the courage.....yes i am tooooo shy.............i am veryyyy shyyyyyyy......sometimes i feel life is fragile but my soul is old........it can bear stuff....it has always borne......but i don't want to trust its capabilities.....its tolerance.....i doubt if i can trust myself......oh life !!!!!! i am shit scared....are u going to hurt me.....are you fooling me.....i can't think that but you never know .....i can't bear to get hurt again please......i am scared to make mistakes....loads of them.....oh .....i cant confront....i willl goooo deeper and deeper .....recede tillll what i don't know....please rescue me.....save me......i am sooooo sooooooo sorryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy..........i can't see u hurt like this......i really really can't .....i saw that in your eyes.....i am soooo soooo soooryyyyyyy.....i humiliated you like this.....i made you feel soooooo alienated.......i can neva bear to look into those hurt eyes......i am soooooo sooooo soooorrrrryyyyyyyyy.........i am soooo soooorrryyyyy for all those months.....for alll that wasted time......but i reallllyyy neva had the courage.....this life you know....its alll about easier said than done....its all about saying and telling stuff.....u can never actually act...i can never.....i am soooo sooooo scared..........i love you so much....how willl i ever confront you now........i will run awayyyy forever forever....i want to see you once ....just once and i will run away forever......but please just be with me naaaaaa....just be around ......just be infront of my eyes.......i want to see life moving into you....life turning you out....you talking....your face.....the motions and the movements....oh is it such a sin???????.........itni badi sazaaaa........??????why why whyyyyyyyyyyy??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????<br />
?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????<br />
i miss you everywhere i go......</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-40820435069528793882011-01-27T12:05:00.000-08:002011-02-05T10:49:20.965-08:00Walk away........<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Teri yadein...its undisputably my favourite song.....its magical....anyways howz u long time no.....i miss you ...a lot ...indeed a lot...i miss ya a lot.....anyays howz life.....i decided to walk away....i should.....i think i should leave you alone....you two u know were perfect together...maybe are.....i wish you luck....i don't need pity ....maybe understanding that you already gave me....so that was that i guess....u two....u know when i looked like that at you two....u guys are like each other......in love .....i don't know what that look meant....maybe i'm still confused very little.....but this was best for both of us.......i will walk away....for your sake.......for mine as well.....for mostly for yours......and you need to realize what you want...u fit in with her the best..... i have to let you go.......trust me its the most loving picture i had ever seen....and i couldn't hold back....i want you to live......live with such intensity....love with such desire......drive it with such passion....i want you....i want you to...i really want you to....to see you laughing waala happy.....like hahahahahaha always.....jumping running like you always do....reflective as you are.....i love those eyes .......such reflection.....non-judjemntal understanding.....perceptive....very very perceptive flowing experience..... loved you for that.....be like that always....even better if you can be......be the way you want to be.....be you always.......you are cardinal ...i kow......you possess an everlasting zest and passion for life ......its amazing....like awsmmmm awsmmmmmmmmm........love it.....i can see life with more understanding now.....wateva.....i'll walk away......u fit in with her....u guys look great together....and whatever is beautiful should stay beautiful.......i want you two to be together....and take my life...all that i have....because i do not possess the ability to make people truly happy.....not atleast to the end....am just toooooooo..... selfish.......and i can't let you suffer because of that....actually can't let anyone suffer on those grounds.....can't hurt you like that anymore.......i know it hurts......i saw that dint of embarrassment or humiliation in those eyes.......and i can never forgive myself for making you feel that way.....after all that you have gone through......i know yours was a painful childhood.....and then your life broke to pieces....and you have....after a long struggle put together the pieces....and have now begun to run.....and i sometimes love to see you run.....u know leap......jump......spring up.......up up and up....i want you to....reallly really want you to.....so i have to turn and walk away....it will hurt me.....but i'll be happy at the end of it....if you get back your love....because that is where you belong......not here.....never here......and i never want you to compromise.......never ever be stuck with me.........fly..........run....spring up and spring down........and have so much fun.....alll the fun that this eternity has to offer ....all the life......all your life ......i want you to be happy.....i want you to live.....a million times more than me........love<br />
mischelle</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-672858895208172292011-01-26T08:31:00.000-08:002011-02-05T11:04:11.919-08:00On the point of selfisness<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">As in how selfish can we be....me you an everyone else....we are such bastards you know ...all of us...assholes...fuckin assholes.......as in we don't really care what everyone else around us feel....to hell with their feelings...as long as we all can have fun......u know what.......i hate people...i hate it when i am forced to be the same...i guess my level of sensitivity towards others is slowly dwindling.......diminishing....what will happen i don't know....i know they are getting hurt....but i think they'll probably deal with it....!!!!!NO ACTUALLY DEAL WITH IT ...WITH IT...!!!!!!sorry diksha...sorry...as in how....how exactly do you expect them to deal with it....treat people the way you expect them to treat you...orelse don't scorn when the world doesn't treat you right...have you forgotten ...no have you??????those standards dikshA ....HAV E YOU EVER LIVED UPTO THEM ....no right no????so don't expect others to be selfless....because the truth is everyone is selfish...forget everyone....i ...myself am such a selfish rascal...that giant who selfishly eats all the dressing...and let others perish in yeast......you burning dog........u'll perish diksha ......failure...in life ......that is all you deserve....go diksha mittal rot in hell.....!!!go fuck your ass.....coz u don't even deserve hell.....get lost.......diksha mittal....u rememba what happens eventually in the cycle of selfishness.....u die...evryone dies...and it makes others around us more selfish.......more and more selfish ....and then everyone gets selfish....and then the world rots....the world perishes...the world hurts each others...wars are waged...cold and hot....barriers hatred egos created....and all of it comes to an end......everything......and life vanishes....dwindles and disappears eventually....and all that is left is ssmoke rising high...touching eternity.....go diksha go! all it takes is a token of selfless service...love ...understanding and affection...actually even one of them suffices......get lost!!!!</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-69423968037098876012011-01-26T07:37:00.000-08:002011-01-26T07:45:43.795-08:00This strange Tech Savy World.....<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">i hate computers....i tell u today i tell you tomorrow.....i hate themm....i don't mind doing my projects...i mostly don't....but i hate it wen they tell me to create a power point presentation....worse still when they tell me to create a movie...i hate you ...i hate them for making me struggle like this...i hated it wen everyone was shocked on learning at NLS MUN that i didnn't how a USB porter is inserted or wateve it is...i still don't but probably i hav a brief idea now....but that time i didn't even know wat it was...probably had just heard about it....ok...and i hate people for making all the works technologically oriented..i hav difficuilty in operating pendrives....laptops new softwares....downloading movies&books (i don't even know how to download them)...although should't be that difficuilt...but frankly i can't handle presentations and moviemaking.....and i hate it wen teachers nowadays tell us to do everything on computers.....as in really i went as a reporter for nls mun thingy....all i needed to do was write.....i mean has the Beauty of Written Words lost its essence and meaning....i hate people ...i hate this technologically driven brutal unkind competitive world....and i am not tech savy...and probably there are very few people who will understand genuinely....but probably it won't matter to them as well.........but u know what i am the last person who cares ASSHOLES!!!!!GET LOST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!FUCK YOU...!!!!</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-42363755241944678672011-01-20T11:17:00.000-08:002011-02-06T09:45:24.451-08:00fucked up life<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">i tell u today i tell you tomorrow...this is a ruthless world....it creates laws.....stupid strange regulations and societal conditionings .......and we are stupids...idiots infact......to fall prey to all this....this society...those bullshit psycho elderlies...what do they think...they could regulate our sexuality...our behaviors and get away with it...???????not done....this is not the way it is....and will never be the way it should it be....they obstruct natural flows....of everything...that bullshit...that's bad......and i hate it!!!!!i mean limits man!enough is enough...i have a life...let me live it....u guys have screwed me enough....to hell with you!!!!u sucked it....u destroyed my beautiful pleasures...and peace of my mind.....get away! get lost!let me live it now.....i think i should probably deserve to live...probably deserve to live the future....get the fucking hell out of my life.....YOU ASSHOLEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-71799713755690040162010-12-31T06:55:00.000-08:002011-02-06T08:07:35.285-08:00My Chocolate Brownie Dayzzzzzz.......<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">U know its winters...and i get that wintry feeling.....i dont really feel like jogging in the cold evenings so i just walk....long evening walks in the dark alone.....i just love them.........and i recently have started feeling like having chocolate brownies daily.........ofcourse without nuts...i just dislike the nuts.....they disturb the pure pleasure of thick liquid riverlike warm molten brownie...i like a little icecream with it...the way the 'classic' people serve it....but i want them to make the brownie warmer and put lesser icecream orelse the entire thing gets cold....but anyways its awsommmmmmm....sinful pleasures and fantasies.........Awwwwwwww........i love my chocolate brownieeeeeee dayzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......and i don't even care about exams and studies.......to hell with them! had destroyed my last year winters slogging for boards....there has to be a limit somewhere....and no one but i understand...i am through competing mindlessly with people...all i do is lie in bed or surf the net amidst my warm furry cosy blankets in my nice warm room....and these winters i feel very less of insecure and very destressed ....and after today very little really........am feeling great nowadayz...really...and i sometimes love being alone.....but i think i should snap out of my dream world and now do some work....exams are a week away.....i don't know if i will actually work or not...but lets see another day today......i dont want to slog in any case anyway.....i will simply study as much as i can comfortably....and i am putting an end to my warm chocolate brownie days.....oh yes ! i forgot to tell u i have developed a likin for my tomato soup that mom prepares daily....and i like it served in my special pink bowl with special white soupy spoon in that special pink tray...orelse i don't feel like having it........and even that keeps me a lot of warm....a more nutritious substitute for warm chocolate brownie......but i just wish i hadn't put on weight during my boards ...i just wish i would have been among those thin girls and enjoyed tomato soups and brownies daily carelessly...but i had slogged a lot in past.....and here is the result ...all i can do is make the most of it now...and enjoy my perfect evenings...ang warm tomato soup days ....which i have begun to love as welllllll.......and try to get to being thin...i want to wear that long white skirt that the vampire's girlfriend wears.......love it .......and for that i will have to be superslim....god help me i want to be thin........anyways.....luvd my chocolate brownie dayzzzz......and here is the new year resolution.......get thin and enjoy life more !!!!!!!!!!</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-31047326081793382412010-12-30T04:06:00.000-08:002011-02-06T08:06:40.490-08:00Eternally in love !<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">U know this crazy habit of being in love almost most of the time of my life.......there have been minor attractions here and there....but you know very very few major crushes.........i guess this is the second or the third......i think i should say third as far as the entire life span goes......but the second matured one....and you know the thing about this this is majorly unresponsive ...as in i have never chased really never...infact that arrogantly anti-relationship freak i had spent the prime of my teenage years as .......u know i didn't end up knowing much about love......and i had believed those stupid theories and notions that friends and family had feeded me with ....but they had also made me be a silent observer ...an observing audience for a long time ...and seriously...now i have begun to create my own original views......my own interpretations...they may be wrong...infact some of them don't exactly seem to work out with me....but still i love doing this...this is much better than withholding myself.....and listening to those mindless idiots....who simply follow the hearsay and rat race and that bhed chaal as we put it......<br />
so moral of the story could be....never believe the hearsay....don't comment unless we have experienced stuff for our own....orelse w might as well end up messing stuff........life could have turned out certainly better had i just listened to my heart......<br />
love<br />
mischelle</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6138058410370211192.post-79321492232875888052010-12-30T03:42:00.000-08:002011-02-05T10:50:24.129-08:00So begun blogging.....<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">U know i had always wanted to blog...since i was in class 9....and i kept on procrastinating....always always and always......probably coz i was lazy...and more so fear of the technicalities of gadgets and this complicated world of internet...and creating an account and bullshit.....and exams(that was the time when i took exams seriously ).....a friend ..a cousin had once mentioned it here and there and see years went by....unfruitful....as in we loose our diaries ..our random pages on which we write precious random stuff.....our random fleeting thoughts and awesome amazing ideas don't even last in our memory for a day....but see....this this is the thing about e-blogs and the net....it preserves...anyways.....it would have been fun to read my articles and my mind...a few years later...how times change...and how we change ...and how we thought that time....and u know u can't post every bullshit thing on facebook ..i mean u can but still there might be a hesitation sometimes.....here and there......so here its a free world ..and welcome so finally i am on blog before this another landmark year ends...and yes i did make it to LSR....i did live up to those dreams somewhere...but this time i may want something different....entirely different...very high chance....anyays...ceeya and congratulations..anyways...for creating a blog that should have been four years before.........and yes i am in love nowadays...i forgot to tell u...love ya!!!!!!</div>Diksha Mittalhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13807418654971078046noreply@blogger.com0